6:21 a.m., 2004-10-29
I got off the phone last night and tore up the card I've been trying to send him for a month now. I was so angry and frustrated. Why can't he just do simple things when I ask him? Like...perhaps learning his address or at least writing it down and telling it to me. He's been there a month and I've asked so many times.
Yesterday, around 3pm. I called him to ask him for about the twentieth time to please send me his address. That day, because I had something I wanted to send him. He said yea, made promises, whatever. I told him to call also when he was ready to talk, because he's been avoiding me in this messed up funk that he's in. Which feels really nice, by the way.
What also feels nice is when he calls around 10pm to say that he can't really talk because he's busy but he wanted to make sure he called. I really hate that anyway, but then when I said I had hoped to hear back from him, it was "oh crap!" and a thousand sorries that are supposed to make up for the fact that now the second thing I wanted to send him is going to be late, broken promise, all that.
It took a lot of self control not to tear that to shreds either, but I didn't. I went to bed right after we talked last night feeling really crappy...of course what else is new after we talk, lately?
